Sigh.
The week is over.
48 hours of nothing. Maybe something. Who knows?
Three tests this week, one conclusion: I hate Astronomy. No, its not an easy A. Or maybe I am just a dumbass.
Lent begins. No more...yea...till Easter. But I will be running 5 days a week and doing a crap load of pull ups. I couldn't think of anything interesting this year. I blame Astronomy. Maybe I'll go to church more. It makes me uncomfortable sometimes though. I dunno. I really don't want to talk about it either.
Uncomfort.
I am sort of scared right now. Several reasons. I am the Corps. That's one. There is more that goes along with that. Let's just say people know. That scares me. Scandals and secrets. They suck. And some stuff is coming up. I am going to be super busy next year. That sort of scares me. I guess I get scared easily...maybe not. Maybe there is reason...maybe not.
I am running for class Vice President.
I applied for Corps Sergeant Major or B-Company 1st Sergeant.
I applied to be on MEDALS Exec Staff again for next year.
I am a Nichols Rising Leader Conference Delegate.
I will be working with the University President on a scholarship committee. Only five students university-wide got chosen. Yea, I'm kind of a big deal.
I applied for Fish Camp Counselor...I find out Monday if I get it.
I'll still be in the Band, and in the Corps, of course.
And unfortunatley, I will have to take classes, but probably only like 12 hours. I am ahead anyway. Aggie Ring here I come.
I am stressed, but not right now. I am just relieved this week is over. Hopefully this weekend will go well. Party tonight. Houston Livestock Parade tomorrow. Houston partying tomorrow night. Then Sunday.
I just realized this was my first blog of the year. 2007. Two years till 2009. I'll be a senior. 2006 was good. End of fish year, beginning of sophomore year. An awesome summer, being independent and paying for gas in pennies.
Relationships.
None of them worked, and its not a big deal to me. I don't miss any of my ex's. I am happy dating and meeting new people.
I think I am pretty complacent with where I am right now. Things are working out, doors are opening. My grades are okay...I think..I hope. I can't afford to have a bad semester. I don't think it will be. I have faith.
Faith.
Man this is tough. I am sort of lost when it comes to faith. I believe in God, of course. I don't know about the Catholic faith though. I've talked to a few people about this. Most people here are lost too, but don't realize it. I know God wants us to question. God wants us to seek and find, not just assume based on what we were told. I tell people that I have more respect for an atheist who can tell me why they are atheist verses a Christian who can't tell me why they believe. The Christians are the ones I come across though. Most of my friends are this way. Ignorant. Believe what they are told without question. This is a problem with society. Tunnel vision. It sucks.
Sucking.
I suck at sports. Granted, I am a lot more athletic that I was in high school. But I still suck at the following: football, basketball, softball/baseball, etc. I am good at running, doing pushups, pullups, and thats about it. I can probably do more than you. Unless you are Landon Longley. I am runnning a half marathon here in College Station next week. Marathon running is something I enjoy. Okay, I've only done one marathon, but it was a blast, and this one is only a half.
Half.
A number. Point-Five. 50%. Whatever. Number are cool. Sort of, depending on the circumstance.
One week until the Armadillo Dash Half Marathon.
Two Weeks until Spring Break. (Woo Hoo for Florida!!)
Three weeks, the end of spring break and campaigning.
Four Weeks: Big Event and Platoon Competition.
Five Weeks until the Nichols Rising Leader Conference.
Six Weeks until Easter weekend. I will be going home for the first time this semester.
Seven weeks until Parents weekend. Positions for next year will be finalized.
Eight weeks until Aggie Muster.
Nine Weeks until March to the Brazos, and the end of sophomore privi's. Butt '09!!
Then Dead Week and Finals. Thats it. Nine weeks. Crazy, I know.
My sister came down last weekend to Spend the Night with the Corps and visit. We had a lot of fun, and it was good to see her. She loved A&M.
I have pictures in about 30 minutes. My random thoughts are ending. I'll write a real blog later. Or not. :)
Peace.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
The Answer to: Taboo
It's over.
It hurts.
I fell.
Not into grass.
Not into a big ball of cotton.
Into concrete.
And it hurts.
Bad.
The least expected happened.
I don't understand why.
But it's better this way.
In the words of Fergie...
"I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket, but I've got to get a move on with my life. It's time to be a big [boy] now, and big [boys] don't cry."
...I'm not gonna cry.
It hurts.
I fell.
Not into grass.
Not into a big ball of cotton.
Into concrete.
And it hurts.
Bad.
The least expected happened.
I don't understand why.
But it's better this way.
In the words of Fergie...
"I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket, but I've got to get a move on with my life. It's time to be a big [boy] now, and big [boys] don't cry."
...I'm not gonna cry.
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Monday, July 2, 2007
Graduation
I found out today that I can graduate in four years with two majors....I am thinking of adding a third.
Is that crazy?
Sociology, Communications, thinking of adding Spanish. It's all under Liberal Arts. It shouldn't be too hard...I just want to be here five years.
Is that crazy?
Sociology, Communications, thinking of adding Spanish. It's all under Liberal Arts. It shouldn't be too hard...I just want to be here five years.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
An Outsider's View of Texas A&M
I read this and thought it was HILARIOUS!! Only Aggies will understand :)
By: Chris Bellamy
Posted: 9/9/03
I tried to escape. Honest, I did. But believe me when I tell you, I didn't know what the hell was going on. What was happening around me was dumbfounding, disturbing, frightening.
I don't know what it was that compelled me to stay. Maybe it was fear. Maybe it was my obscene sense of curiosity. Maybe it was the smell.
Whatever the reason, last Friday night I found myself, along with my co-workers Asad Kudiya and Kevin Buehler, in probably the most peculiar situation of my life.
Cannons were firing. People were chanting. They were gyrating in unison. My God, they were doing synchronized pushups!
This was called "The Yell," and I found myself unwittingly and unintentionally thrown into the middle of it. It was there that I began to discover just what College Station, Texas was all about-and I'm not exaggerating when I say it may have changed my life forever.
More than 30,000 Aggie fans crowded the streets outside the stadium just before midnight last Friday, as they do before every home game, ready to take part in this massive pre-game pep rally.
Now, I had always heard about cults. I had even seen a few documentaries on them on The Learning Channel. Heaven's Gate. Jim Jones and The People's Temple.
But never had I seen a cult up close and personal until we settled into our places in Kyle Field Friday night.
It started with the pushups. Then it was the "Fighting Aggie War Hymn," a tune repeated ad nauseam all night long, one that still rings in my head at this very hour.
Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. All hail to dear old Texas A&M...
Then it got weird. A group of young men, wearing matching overalls, took center stage down on the sidelines as the raucous crowd suddenly hushed. The men began leading these Aggie faithful in chants, cheers and the reading of Masonic verses.
And everyone knew exactly what to do-and when to do it. They knew what every hand gesture meant. They knew every word of every chant and every song.
Everyone except us, of course. We, visitors from Utah, did not belong. We did not have the ceremony down by heart. But we did what we were told. What else could we do?
"I was confused...and scared," a genuinely shaken Asad told me afterward. "I felt like if I didn't do what they were doing, they were going to rape me."
We leaned over and bowed our heads with the rest of them. We repeated those infernal chants and sang the praises of the Aggie gods. We leaped up and threw our hands in the air, and praised the Good Laaaaawwwwd, as the four men down in front declared a Jihad on the Utah Ute football team.
Beat the hell out of Utah, they chanted. Beat the hell out of Utah!!
The four Yell leaders wailed on the microphone and told the crowd to Riiiiiise Up! They made a strange, Hitler-looking gesture to the crowd, and all of a sudden the people around us threw their arms around us and we all began to sway from side to side, singing that war hymn...and it was then that I realized that everyone was speaking in tongues.
Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. We're gonna beat you all to Chigaroogarem. Chigaroogarem. Rough, tough, real stuff, Texas A&M!
My memory is a little fuzzy, but if I remember correctly, everyone around us was wearing long, white cloaks and burning candles. And If I'm not mistaken, there was a virgin sacrifice as well.
Strange and terrible things began happening inside me. These people had been brainwashed, I was sure of it...but...I kind of liked it. I was oddly titillated by the whole experience, ashamed as I am to admit that.
I was conflicted. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I loved them and loathed them. I was repulsed, yet mysteriously drawn to their sick, twisted game, comforted by this theatre of mass worship, this cornucopia of rabid fan psychosis. It was like a KKK gathering on mushrooms.
Talk about worshipping false idols. This was just for the football team, for Pete's sake. The football team!
The U football team sometimes struggles to get 35,000 fans at the actual game-A&M got that many for the pep rally. On a late Friday night, no less. These kids should have been getting wasted, having sex and walking around town in a drunken stupor stealing stop signs and falling asleep in public fountains.
But no-at half past midnight, they were at the football stadium, worshipping Dennis Franchione while four boys in overalls did their best impression of an Episcopal sermon.
I'd never seen anything like this place. None of us had.
I mean, what can you say about a town that simultaneously symbolizes everything that is right about college football, and everything that's wrong about our nation's educational system?
But it wasn't just the football fans-the whole town of College Station was ass-backward.
The place was littered with the scary but aptly named Crickets on Steroids with Wings, which may or may not have been the apocalyptic, flesh-eating bugs prophesied in the Bible.
The night desk clerk at our hotel was named Lucifer. Everyone in town drove a maroon-colored pickup truck. The uniform code at every business establishment was an Aggies T-shirt. The school marching band looked uncannily like the Third Reich. We went to a bar where people actually played darts for hours and hours on end. Who does that?!
Small things, I know. But after our experience Friday night, every little thing made the town seem all the more strange.
When we left "The Yell" Friday night, none of us could speak. What the hell just happened, we all thought to ourselves. That wasn't just school spirit-it was something different altogether. Those people were just...different. If this wasn't a cult, I didn't know what was.
The experience of College Station was an odd one. To tell you the truth, I'm just glad I got out of there alive. Hopefully, the place didn't rub off on me.
Hullabaloo, caneck, caneck. Chigaroogarem. Chigaroogarem.
cbellamy@chronicle.utah.edu
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
© Copyright 2007 The Daily Utah Chronicle
By: Chris Bellamy
Posted: 9/9/03
I tried to escape. Honest, I did. But believe me when I tell you, I didn't know what the hell was going on. What was happening around me was dumbfounding, disturbing, frightening.
I don't know what it was that compelled me to stay. Maybe it was fear. Maybe it was my obscene sense of curiosity. Maybe it was the smell.
Whatever the reason, last Friday night I found myself, along with my co-workers Asad Kudiya and Kevin Buehler, in probably the most peculiar situation of my life.
Cannons were firing. People were chanting. They were gyrating in unison. My God, they were doing synchronized pushups!
This was called "The Yell," and I found myself unwittingly and unintentionally thrown into the middle of it. It was there that I began to discover just what College Station, Texas was all about-and I'm not exaggerating when I say it may have changed my life forever.
More than 30,000 Aggie fans crowded the streets outside the stadium just before midnight last Friday, as they do before every home game, ready to take part in this massive pre-game pep rally.
Now, I had always heard about cults. I had even seen a few documentaries on them on The Learning Channel. Heaven's Gate. Jim Jones and The People's Temple.
But never had I seen a cult up close and personal until we settled into our places in Kyle Field Friday night.
It started with the pushups. Then it was the "Fighting Aggie War Hymn," a tune repeated ad nauseam all night long, one that still rings in my head at this very hour.
Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. All hail to dear old Texas A&M...
Then it got weird. A group of young men, wearing matching overalls, took center stage down on the sidelines as the raucous crowd suddenly hushed. The men began leading these Aggie faithful in chants, cheers and the reading of Masonic verses.
And everyone knew exactly what to do-and when to do it. They knew what every hand gesture meant. They knew every word of every chant and every song.
Everyone except us, of course. We, visitors from Utah, did not belong. We did not have the ceremony down by heart. But we did what we were told. What else could we do?
"I was confused...and scared," a genuinely shaken Asad told me afterward. "I felt like if I didn't do what they were doing, they were going to rape me."
We leaned over and bowed our heads with the rest of them. We repeated those infernal chants and sang the praises of the Aggie gods. We leaped up and threw our hands in the air, and praised the Good Laaaaawwwwd, as the four men down in front declared a Jihad on the Utah Ute football team.
Beat the hell out of Utah, they chanted. Beat the hell out of Utah!!
The four Yell leaders wailed on the microphone and told the crowd to Riiiiiise Up! They made a strange, Hitler-looking gesture to the crowd, and all of a sudden the people around us threw their arms around us and we all began to sway from side to side, singing that war hymn...and it was then that I realized that everyone was speaking in tongues.
Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. Hullabaloo, Caneck, Caneck. We're gonna beat you all to Chigaroogarem. Chigaroogarem. Rough, tough, real stuff, Texas A&M!
My memory is a little fuzzy, but if I remember correctly, everyone around us was wearing long, white cloaks and burning candles. And If I'm not mistaken, there was a virgin sacrifice as well.
Strange and terrible things began happening inside me. These people had been brainwashed, I was sure of it...but...I kind of liked it. I was oddly titillated by the whole experience, ashamed as I am to admit that.
I was conflicted. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I loved them and loathed them. I was repulsed, yet mysteriously drawn to their sick, twisted game, comforted by this theatre of mass worship, this cornucopia of rabid fan psychosis. It was like a KKK gathering on mushrooms.
Talk about worshipping false idols. This was just for the football team, for Pete's sake. The football team!
The U football team sometimes struggles to get 35,000 fans at the actual game-A&M got that many for the pep rally. On a late Friday night, no less. These kids should have been getting wasted, having sex and walking around town in a drunken stupor stealing stop signs and falling asleep in public fountains.
But no-at half past midnight, they were at the football stadium, worshipping Dennis Franchione while four boys in overalls did their best impression of an Episcopal sermon.
I'd never seen anything like this place. None of us had.
I mean, what can you say about a town that simultaneously symbolizes everything that is right about college football, and everything that's wrong about our nation's educational system?
But it wasn't just the football fans-the whole town of College Station was ass-backward.
The place was littered with the scary but aptly named Crickets on Steroids with Wings, which may or may not have been the apocalyptic, flesh-eating bugs prophesied in the Bible.
The night desk clerk at our hotel was named Lucifer. Everyone in town drove a maroon-colored pickup truck. The uniform code at every business establishment was an Aggies T-shirt. The school marching band looked uncannily like the Third Reich. We went to a bar where people actually played darts for hours and hours on end. Who does that?!
Small things, I know. But after our experience Friday night, every little thing made the town seem all the more strange.
When we left "The Yell" Friday night, none of us could speak. What the hell just happened, we all thought to ourselves. That wasn't just school spirit-it was something different altogether. Those people were just...different. If this wasn't a cult, I didn't know what was.
The experience of College Station was an odd one. To tell you the truth, I'm just glad I got out of there alive. Hopefully, the place didn't rub off on me.
Hullabaloo, caneck, caneck. Chigaroogarem. Chigaroogarem.
cbellamy@chronicle.utah.edu
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
© Copyright 2007 The Daily Utah Chronicle
