"Anywhere in Texas"

A few weeks ago I came face-to-face with this thing we call life. Decisions were thrown at me and all of a sudden I went from being down about doing nothing, to not knowing what I would be doing next. In the back of mind I knew the moment would come. I had worked hard over the last eight years waiting for the defining moment when someone would say: Join us. But with the economy being the way it is one can’t help but to have those feelings of doubt weighing more heavily than the feelings of optimism. One moment, nothing was going my way and in the blink of an eye everything changes. Everything. Lucky for me, I can report that this “life experience” is mostly a positive one, with some unenthusiastic transitional feelings involved. I remember it like it was yesterday, mainly because it almost literally was.

Less than three weeks ago I was outside helping my uncle work on the truck. I had been driving it back and forth from College Station as I moved everything from my beloved Aggieland back to Paradise as well as driving it around town when all of a sudden, while I was driving in fact, my transmission went out. We were hoping for something not as serious, so we began doing minor things: changing the oil, the transmission fluid, checking the modulator valve and such. No luck. And that phrase defines more than what was wrong with the truck. I had had no luck with finding a job, no luck with money, no luck with driving. While I want to say I felt depressed during this time, I feel like that is an exaggeration. It was a rough time emotionally, but after over four years of being away from home, these few weeks had been great, not having to worry about too much, having home cooked meals, and spending time with my family whom are all very close to my heart. After spending a few hours under the truck, I went to my phone to see that I had a voicemail from an unknown number: it was the Partnership for Public Service, located in Washington DC, wanting to interview me for a fellowship position they had available. I immediately called back and scheduled the interview for the same day, actually within the hour. To make a long story short, I was on a flight to DC less than a week later. To add to the mix, I received a position at Teach for America as well. I was offered a teaching job in Los Angeles starting in the end of June teaching high school English and Special Education. It hasn’t even been three weeks since this took place. Since then I also received a call about being a Residence Hall Program Coordinator at the University of North Texas. Obviously, I respectfully declined. I am in the nation’s capital now, awaiting a snow storm that will arrive this afternoon and bring 10-20 inches of snow. I’ve experienced three snow storms in my almost 14 days in Washington. “I don’t need to go home, but anywhere in Texas will be fine…”

The Partnership for Public Service –
So far my experience here has been wonderful. I have a contract that is for six months. I am working as a Communications Fellow. You can compare that to an internship except that it is more glorified. I do get paid and I have more responsibility than any internship programs I have ever heard of. I work with a supervisor in promoting programs that we have coming up as well as doing a lot of writing and editing for different things within the organization. I knew some about the Partnership when applying for the fellowship, but the more I learn about it, the more I am in love with what this organization does. Simply put, we help make the government better. I won’t go into long, drawn-out detail about it, but if you are genuinely interested, we have some job openings. Our website: http://ourpublicservice.org.

Teach for America –
I found out about my position with Teach for America the afternoon after I had accepted my offer with the Partnership. When I first found out about it my immediate worries were

1. Moving to Los Angeles, mainly because of all the horror stories you hear about drugs, gangs, etc.
2. Teaching special education.

While I checked the box that said that I would be willing to teach special education, it became a reality when I read it on my acceptance. As if being a part of TFA was already not a challenge within itself, I would be facing the same challenges but with a larger education gap. The ambitious side of me wants to dive in with full confidence knowing that I would be successful, but then there is the other side of me that wonders if I am ready to take on something like this. These issues were honestly less complex compared to the immediate problem that this added decision posed. The timeline I had: Arrive in DC on January 27th. Make a decision about Teach for America by February 5th. End fellowship mid-June. Begin TFA training on June 27th. TFA commitment, two years. Reading the timeline it all technically coincides but we are missing an overarching commitment that I made almost two years ago: The Marine Corps.

The Marine Corps –
I’ve been a part of the Marine Corps for almost two years now. In the last six months or so I’ve been dealing with some problems with my unit that I won’t get into mainly because I am not ready to talk about it all in full detail. These problems have made me think about my commitment to the Marine Corps and what it is I am trying to gain from this experience. So far, I feel like I have not gotten very much from my time spent within the service. For this reason I feel it is important that I serve not as a once-a-month reservist but full time, active duty. This is what I want to do after my fellowship here in DC. For the time being however, I am working on sorting everything out, and getting into a reserve unit here in Washington. I’ll do my once-a-month thing here and then finish my training all at once after I am done at the Partnership. From there, I am going to keep things fluid: option 1, Officer Candidate School. Option 2, stay enlisted but active duty, hopefully going overseas somewhere. As most of you know, service in this capacity is one of the things that I feel are the most important for me. While this may change a million times by the time the end of my fellowship arrives, this is what I would like to see play out within the next year. I will probably decline my TFA offer within the next week or so. I can’t do all three, as much as I wish I could. In my mind, I am working within public service in any of the choices all make. Its reassuring that I am doing the right thing when I tell myself that. I know those kids in LA need me, but there are bigger problems in the world to tackle right now. Not that the kids aren’t important, it’s just what I need to do right now. I am rambling now and trying to justify to myself that I am doing the right thing. The rambling is testament to the fact that even I don’t know if I am…

For now, I need to get adjusted to being in a new place. I remember moving to Paradise, moving to College Station, and now moving to Washington DC. It takes time and talking to everyone from home has made it both easier and harder. The massive amounts of snow and the fact that my friend base is very small make me miss and want to go back to Texas. “Anywhere in Texas will be fine.” I know it will take time but it is a lot to get used to. I miss my family, my buddies, my friends, and of course that spirit of Aggieland that you can’t find anywhere else in the world. I am compiling a “DC Bucket List” that I am hoping to publish soon. Until then, God Bless and Gig ‘em!

Blog inspired by song "Anywhere in Texas" by Kyle Park